PREDATOR CANCELLED
NBC has cancelled the show "To catch a Predator." Leaving perverts everywhere to have to resort to watching the upcoming Olympics broadcast of female gymnastics.




HIGHER LEARNING
Half of Americans say U.S. schools are doing a poor job preparing kids for college and the work force. The other half were out of work high school dropouts and who couldn’t read the survey.




PISTOL WHIPPED
Last week, the U.S. Supreme Court lifted the ban on handguns in Washington D.C. Since then, a record number of Congressman have been suspiciously absent from the Capitol.



WE'LL LEAVE THE LIGHT ON FOR YA
A new study finds that 25% of all hotel rooms have some type of bed bugs. Coincidentally, these are the same hotel rooms where Paris Hilton stayed.



MANDELA IS TRULY FREE
The US has finally removed Nelson Mandela from a three-decade old immigration watch list for possible terrorists. This may have been pre-mature as reports of Mandela threatening airport security with his Nobel Peace Prize have just surfaced.

And really…Nelson Mandela on the Terrorist Watch List is like having George W. Bush on the Mensa List. Just doesn’t make sense now does it?